In the midst of life’s daily grind, it’s easy to lose sight of the carefree, curious, and confident child we once were. The pressures of adulthood—work, relationships, responsibilities—can leave us feeling burnt out, unfulfilled, and disconnected from our true selves. But what if the key to navigating these challenges lies in reconnecting with our inner child?
The Power of the Inner Child
The concept of the inner child, popularized by psychologist Carl Jung and self-help guru John Bradshaw, suggests that our childhood experiences and the way we were parented continue to influence our adult lives. By reconnecting with and nurturing our inner child, we can heal old wounds, break free from dysfunctional patterns, and rediscover our innate joy and authenticity.
Relationship coach and host of The Inner Child Podcast, Gloria Zhang, initially dismissed the idea as “new age bullshit.” But after struggling with insomnia, OCD, and a deep-seated sense of unworthiness that drove her to overwork and neglect her own needs, Zhang discovered that inner child work was the missing piece in her healing journey.
“We are naturally capable of experiencing joy; we don’t need to teach ourselves how to do that. What we do need is to give ourselves permission,” Zhang explains.
Reparenting Yourself
At its core, inner child work involves “reparenting” yourself—treating yourself with the love, attention, and care you may not have received growing up. This can be as simple as:
- Prioritizing basic needs like eating well, staying hydrated, and getting enough sleep
- Allowing yourself to rest when you’re tired
- Engaging in play and activities you enjoyed as a child
- Validating your own emotions and needs
By attuning to and meeting these needs, you can begin to shift your priorities and establish healthier boundaries in adulthood. As Zhang points out, “No little girl ever dreamed of working 80-hour weeks.”
Rediscovering Joy and Wonder
Reconnecting with your inner child can also help you rediscover a sense of joy, play, and wonder that may have gotten lost in the responsibilities of adulthood. Zhang suggests simple practices like:
- Lying in the grass and watching clouds drift by
- Going for walks with no destination in mind
- Singing or dancing spontaneously
- Revisiting beloved books, movies, or activities from childhood
“It turns out, it doesn’t take much to make me happy,” Zhang reflects. “I just wasn’t doing those things before.”
A New Perspective on Adulthood
Beyond just relieving stress and increasing joy, connecting with your inner child can offer a powerful new perspective on your adult life. Imagining how your childhood self would view your current circumstances—your home, job, relationships, accomplishments—can foster a profound sense of gratitude and self-compassion.
As we navigate the complexities of adulthood, it’s easy to get bogged down in stress, self-doubt, and the pressure to prove ourselves. But by nurturing our inner child and giving ourselves permission to prioritize joy, play, and self-care, we can tap into a powerful source of healing, resilience, and authentic self-expression.
“I actually feel more like a child now than I did at 10,” Zhang shares—a testament to the transformative power of inner child work.
So the next time you find yourself feeling overwhelmed, disconnected, or unfulfilled, consider taking a moment to check in with your inner child. Ask what they need, what would bring them joy, and how you can show up for them the way you wish someone had during your childhood. You may just find that the answers you’ve been seeking have been inside you all along.
